How To Stop Hating Monday
how to own your days and stoP letting your days own you
Do you ever wake up on Monday morning and feel like you don’t even know what you’re doing or how you’re going to do it? You’re like, “Where do I begin today?” Maybe your kids wake you up, and if you’re anything like me, it’s not my most favourite way to start the day. Do you feel like some times, your days own you? Your priorities and life's responsibilities are kicking your butt. I get it! That used to be my every day at one point in my life, and not just my Mondays! While I think there are SO many ways to come at this and share great advice on how to overcome it.
I want to share three of the biggest things that have helped me and are continuing to help me grow as I navigate motherhood, marriage, and entrepreneurship.
HERE THEY ARE!
1 // You NEED to ask yourself, what does success mean to you?
Alright, you might be like, what does this have to do with brightening up my Monday morning or my Friday afternoon? Let me explain. So much of my chaos is tied up trying to be successful every day. I have squirrel brain and so if I don’t understand what I am actually chasing (in life and in my mind), my days become consumed by jumping from task to task, which leads to burning out, which leads to not starting my days off on the right foot. It’s an ongoing cycle.
I actually created a little FREEBIE for you, so you can do this exercise at home, and hang it somewhere you can see it!
I did this exercise so I could build my days around THIS list, not the to-do list! They are two very different things.
What happens when you’re operating from a to-do list, is the things you value most can often slide to the bottom, day after day, week after week and eventually year after year. Date night, suppers with your family, going to the gym. It can be easier to say no to yourself, and the people you love, than saying no to all of the other things on your to-do list. I’m not saying you should stop working, but I am saying you should prioritize your tasks. I know it sounds simple, but if you want to enjoy life and stop feeling like you're constantly being burnt out, you can’t afford NOT to do this exercise and get your priorities straight.
You can’t get to where you’re going if you don’t know where you’re at.
2 // Find some consistency and start creating routines
Two words that were not in my vocabulary for a long time. I used to think routines were for losers who don’t know how to have fun. The thought of having a consistent schedule made me feel trapped, and I thought it would take my time and freedom. The funny part is that as I grow in becoming a more consistent person and as I develop consistent routines, I am finding that I actually have more time and more freedom. Consistency has meant fewer arguments between Tim and me because we already know what most days are going to look like in the mornings, which are typically our most chaotic time of day. This has honestly freed up so much more of our time than we realized, like the other morning we were both sitting on the couch at 8:00 drinking coffee together, listening to music as the kids play because they were fed, ready for school, lunches packed like 80% ready to go. This was unheard of in my house last year!
If you’d like to know what exactly what things we’ve become more consistent in, go read this post.
3 // Manage your expectations and set some boundaries
Okay, this is where the Monday thing really comes into play. I am guilty of being a Monday hater, I know the feeling of being groggy, and either not wanting the weekend to be over (If I am not shooting weddings) OR if I am shooting weddings, feeling like I was always behind on Monday because I was still nursing my wedding hangover on Sunday. Mondays felt like hamster wheel days, but here is why. My expectations were too high for Monday, so I have given myself permission to take Monday EASY. Mondays I am not putting the pressure on myself to have my son on the school bus for daycare at 8:25 am and having Posey to school at the same time. I am not giving myself tasks that are overwhelming or putting too much on my plate. I am keeping my son home from daycare, so that means I am going to be present with him, and I am giving myself permission to check emails during nap time or work on self-education. That’s it and I am hoping to keep it this way right into the wedding season. This year I made it a point to have my memory cards uploaded, backed up, and images culled the night I got home from the wedding, or by the next morning before we would go to church so I wasn’t dragging that work with me into the following week. I have been getting better at this over the years and it’s made a drastic difference in my workflow and getting to fully enjoy time with my family. I also rarely book shoots on Mondays and Sundays are totally off-limits.
I know that this might not work for everyone, but whether you work for yourself at home, you run a big business with a large team, you do shift work or you work 9-5 Monday-Friday, I believe you can still manage your expectations for the day and week and you can set boundaries for yourself and your family. Maybe you’re overextending yourself on the weekend and making too many commitments to other people’s needs. Whatever it is, you have more control than you think!
My hope is that, in sharing my own experiences in real-time, and not waiting until I “have arrived” or perfected any of this (because that won’t ever happen) that you will feel encouraged and empowered to make the changes you need in your own life.